That Moment …

lessons-in-lifeThat moment when you look at old photos of you and your ex and … instead of you feeling hurts and lots of pain, it makes you smiles.

That moment when you realize that you no longer hurts by watever happen in the past.

That moment, you dwell in the past for the good of memories and just cherish it rather then let the pain come back and hurts you all over again.

That moment when you recently see him at the gym and you wish him well and that he is doing well.

That moment when you see him again and he is like a complete stranger all over again.

That moment when you wants nothing for him but the best only.

That moment when you are thankful for the experience you have with him and because of whatever happen, it taught you to know yourself better and become the person you are today.

That moment when you know that your heart and you have move on.

Mesmerize About The Past

2013 - lunchWe were told not to dwell in the past but sometime you cannot help yourself.

Lately I have been dwell in the past, my past. Since facebook has the feature of “Memories look back on today” from years ago. I was able to see what I did a few years ago.

“OH those happy moments!!!”

They seem so real but at the same time, just a memories. Where has it gone? And what happen?

Today about 2 yrs ago, as stated in my status post, “the handsome one and I went to lunch before we head out to wine tasting in Old Sugar Mill in Clarksburg.”

It is bittersweet memory that I will forever cherish. I don’t know how he and I came to be the way we are. It’s been 9 months since we went our own way. I believed he has move on himself as I am allowing myself to move on too. Like they said “TIME” will heal the wound and give time, someone will come along and put all the broken piece together.

I am thankful for the experiences; to love, the memories, the many places we had travel and visit, and the lessons we have share with one another. I think that without it, I will not become the person I am.

2013 - wineAs I mesmerize about my past, a part of me is sadden that two wonderful and amazing persons cannot work out their differences. And a part of me wish him well and that he will be love in the way that I was not able to do so to fulfil his happiness.

Like the saying goes… “If we are meant to be, faith will lead us back to be in each other’s arm again” in the future.

Rejoice “Divorce”

Sometime we got so busy and tied with life that we negligence the important of each other. We forget how special our spouse, boyfriend or significant others are to us. We forget to be thankful of them for being in our life. We become unappreciated of them.

Reminisce the small details of your love for each other and live them daily without forgetting why you love and got married to the other person at the first place!

Beautiful video with a great message send out to it’s audience!

An Outsider

Mus ua Nyab or “the life of a daughter in law” is never easy in the Hmong culture; especially if you are married into a traditional family. There are high expectation from your in-law as well as relatives and the requirement that a woman needs to fulfill within the culture. Hmong along with other Asian race are very close net and family orientated.

This June during Father’s Day, I did not spend the weekend with my own family. I decided to spend the holiday with his family. This is the second time I have met and spend time with his family. (He and I broke up since October of last year. Since then we have reconnected off and on… and taking our time to work things out with one another. Everything between him and I seem like it’s been going well so I agreed to spend the weekend with his family.) I can said that being a outside person to a family is a challenge for me and I think that it always will. I do not know how other “Nyabs” or daughter-in-laws do it but I have awkward moments like: don’t know where to sit, how do I help them out with cooking, and every where I stand, I feel like I was getting in the way. Aside from my awkward thoughts, I did have a great time with his family. They were welcoming and kind. In addition, he was very attended to me; making sure I don’t feel alone or left out. It’s possible that since I have not spend much time with them, I still feel uncomfortable around his family.

While at their house, I send texts to my two married sisters (my older sister just got married this past May, 2014) and mentioned to them how they were able to be married and live with just that one man for the rest of their lives like this. Because I have awkward moments and I am struggling to get custom to the family. As sweet as they are, they text me back with advise. They said that you just get used to the bf/husband’s family and relatives once you start to mingle and see them often. I was still not convince by their words because seem like a strange world and I do not know anyone beside him. My replied to them was that I am not sure if I will want to take the marriage path because I don’t want to leave my family and be among others who I do not know at all. Also told them that I am willing to pay the “bride price” for the guy to be a “nyab” to me ( jokingly…lolz) and move away from his family. My two sister laugh and text back that it is impossible and not part of our Hmong custom. Hmong son will not leave their parents and roots to be a “nyab”.

It is sad but it’s true. Most sons in the Hmong culture will not do that; leave their family and relativse to lived with the girl’s family. This is because the family believe sons are the one who will carry the family name. This go back to the taboo that most Asian races/groups practice, wanting to birth sons only. However, will leave that to another blog topic discussion on it’s own.

 

How is it like for you during your first visit with your significant other’s family? Any awkwardness or uncomfortable moment? How do you overcome it? Any inputs definitely will allow some insight into the journey of a daughter-in-law.

Happy 2 Years Anniversary!

Happy Anniversary!

You registered on WordPress.com 2 years ago!

Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging!

As I came on to wordpress today to blog about something else and I saw a notification that it is my 2 years anniversary on wordpress. I remember that I start blogging back in 2012 around march but did not know the exact date.

It has been two long years for me and fill with quiet a few memorable blog posts that help me recall the last two years. I start out the blog on collecting piece of arts that will fit into what is called “hmong chic” style for my future wedding…. he he he. Then it turn into recapping little things I find on the internet that is interesting to me. I blog about my past love experience, the lies I been told to by men and the pain that come after. I talked about my thoughts and emotions and the growth that I develop over the years as well as the little life lesson that I learned. I have fallen in love and went  through a break up. I know how a broken heart felt like and how emotionally drained a break can take on a person. I went through a stage of wondering “what if…” this or that happen, will I be in a better place. I do a lots of reflecting back to my past for personal growth, to understand what I did wrong so I can improve myself and my mistakes.

Today, I came back on here because I wants to write a reflection piece of my past. I have came to accepted my wrong doing so I can move forward. So look forward to that one up head.

There have been so many thing come and go; things change and so do people. It’s been two amazing years to reflected on and remember by. Happy 2 years Anniversary Unforgettable Adventures and cheer to two and more incredible years to come!

True Love

Frozen_castposterJust finish watching “Frozen” Disney movie. Although it is a kid movie, it is quit enjoyable. It show the strength of Anna and Elsa. I think that it’s a great movie to influence young girls to think positive and never let anything stop them from achieving what their heart desire.

The most fascinating part to me is at the end of the movie where Anna was unfrozen due to true love; an act of true love. Anna thought that a kiss of true love will set her unfrozen and rush herself back to the castle to see Hans. Come to realize that Hans was a jerk and then rush herself to Kristoff for a kiss of true love. Instead she act out of her true love for Elsa; sacrifice herself to save Elsa from Hans.

In society standard or the way we always see — is — true love is always been done by an act of a man to a woman. In this Disney movie, it show that true love can happen from one to other regardless the gender. Anna’s act of true love for her older sister Elisa set her free from being frozen. It is a powerful message send by Frozen Disney movie. I hope that parents were able to grasp that and share with their little kids.

To watch full version of “Frozen”  free online, click here.

A Hmong Man Dying Wishes

Saw this post up on a Hmong page via facebook. It bring sadness to me because I haven’t experience much; just like this Hmong man wish he could had. Through my experience with my mom’s cancer 6 years ago, I cannot imagine what this Hmong man is going through on his death bed. Not sure if this story is true or not, but if it is… If there is a next life, may he fulfill all his wishes.

Anonymous wrote:

 

Dear beloved friends,

 

I found out I have stage 4 cancer and doctors told me I have 2-3 months to live. I never thought this day would come. I felt like my life has just started and it’s now coming to an end. I’m 34 years old. To be completely honest I am terrified of dying and every day it gets harder to say goodbye.  Continue reading